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Joke of the Day

"What do Led Zeppelin and New Orleans have in common ""When the Levi breaks, we have no place to stay"""

"Wanna know my secret to rock hard abs? I ride the mechanical duck outside the grocery store 300 times a day."

"*takes off pants* *crawls into bed* Security Guard- Lady, this is Macy's *crawls out of bed* *puts on pants* SG- Those aren't your pants"

"I have a rather unique talent. You can give me any girl's name and I know a song for that name. Try me!"

"My girlfriend just walked in and called me gay... If my nails weren't drying I swear to god..."

"E-Mail: Drive her wild in the bedroom. Me: Feh...I'll drive her wild in the kitchen *Re-arranges the dishwasher."

"What do you call a black person on the moon? An astronaut. What else would you call them?"

"A man gets his drill and drills a hole in a wall... ..its a bit boring."

"How to tell if you're girlfriend is TOO fat. When she sits on your face and you can't hear your stereo any more."

"Never trust trees. They're shady."