115180

Joke of the Day

"My grandfather's last words.. My Grandfather said, ""Your generation relies too much on technology!"" I replied, ""No, your generation relies too much on technology!"" Then I unplugged his life support."

"Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn't jump at all."

"2 guys walk into a bar. The first one says i want h2O and has a drink. Says damn this is good. The second guy says ""bartender, I want some h2O too."" The second guy dies."

"The Flash is lucky because he can run real fast but also because he lives in a world where every problem can be solved by running real fast."

"What makes a feminist prostitute angry? She gets payed less than the transsexual prostitute."

"A man went to a fish and chip lunch organised by the local monastery... He strolls up to one guy serving, and with a big grin, asks ""Are you the fish friar?"" The guy responds ""No, I'm the chip monk!"""

"Why didn't the melons get married? Because they cantaloupe..."

"What do you call a dinosaur with explosive diarrhea? A shitty-sore-ass."

"What is a ducks favourite drug? quack"

"Policeman: I've had my eye on you for some time now. Young Lady: That's funny. I thought you were arresting me for speeding."