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Joke of the Day

"TIL it's possible to jump without a parachute from the top of the Grand Canyon all the way to the bottom. But not twice."

"Q: What's worse than finding a horse's head on your pillow? A: Realising the horse is alive and well and how much did I drink last night?!"

"giv a man a fish adn he'll say ""wat is this i ordered a mcflurry"" teach a man to fish adn he'll say ""how ar u the manager of this mcdonalds"""

"Why do hipsters love Raiders of the Lost Ark? Because it's the first Indy movie."

"why did the 2016 presidential election suck? It was a real Hack job."

"""First time caller, long time listener""Alexander Graham Bell"

"John Cena woke up from a coma John Cena: Where am I? Nurse: ICU John Cena: No you don't. Edit: double enter"

"How do you fit an elephant in a Safeway bag? hint: take the ""S"" out of ""safe"" and the ""F"" out of ""way"""

"My wife told me I had to give up drinking So I joined the AA. Unfortunately, I joined the Automobile Association by mistake. At least either way I'm on the road to recovery."

"Did you hear about the Texas hipster whose bicycle was broken? He was fixin' to get his fixie fixed."