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Joke of the Day
"""First time caller, long time listener""Alexander Graham Bell"
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"Why are ophans no good at baseball? They dont know where home is."
"TAKEN 4 COMING SOON ! Ring , Ring . Kim this is your father. Daddy ? she replies. But, but your dead ! Listen I'm a Ghost , and my Corpse is about to be, TAKEN !lol."
"Where do muslims go when they die? Everywhere."
"I wouldn't take a bullet for you but I'd definitely push someone in front of you to take it for you. Same thing."
"If you're a chick who says ""chivalry is dead"" I hate to be the one to tell you, but its only dead for you because you're ugly."
"Jared from subway You know, if Jared from Subway goes to prison, he is still going to have an unlimited amount of foot longs."
"Q: Why is it good that accordionists have a half-ounce more brains than horses? A: So they don't disgrace themselves in parades."
"My girlfriend stopped being my toaster strudel today... Now that she's on birth control, she became my twinkie!"
"What do you call a British midget mother who can barely support her family? Mini-Mum"