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Joke of the Day

"If Bernie Sanders has more delegates but still gets denied by the DNC... ...that would be unpresidented."

"Lazy people fact #4564321564 You were too lazy to read that number."

"The bible says any man who lies with a man should be taken out and stoned, so I took all my gay friends out and got them wasted."

"What is the cutest car? A BM-cuddle-U"

"Why do white girls always travel in odd numbers? Because they can't even."

"What do woman and KFC have in common After the breast and the thigh there is nothing left but a greasy box to stick your bone in."

"I want to apologize for the awful true things I said when I was angry."

"Did you hear about the Pigeon rebellion? Yeah, it was a ""coo"" d'etat."

"Behind every great man there's a great woman who can take whatever he just said and turn it into a great big fight."

"RIP to the Italian chef, it's nice to gnocchi pasta pizzafully."