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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a low income part of a town or city that is comprised mostly of pasta? The ""Speghetto""."

"Me: Want some of my nachos? Coworker: I don't like nachos. Me: Hello 911, what's consider premeditated murder?"

"People keep saying I need to be more assertive Is that okay?"

"Congress always makes me feel nostalgic for college when I waited for the last minute to do shitty work and blame anyone but myself."

"What do you call a guy with a 2 inch penis? Justin."

"Why can't a storm trooper get a girl pregnant? Because they always miss their target!"

"Let me tell you a Statistics Joke. What is a Car in the U.S.? A mode of transportation. :D"

"Its me and my son's birthday next week so were doing a joint party. We've ordered a Tinkerbell cake for him, but she will be topless for me."

"Why was the Jew afraid to eat the pizza? Because it had pork sausage toppings."

"Indian Chief: What that bottle of vodka for? Me: I got it for my girlfriend. Indian Chief: Good trade."