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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? The picture only needs one nail to hold up."

"I didn't give a f*ck until I drank Red Bull. Now I don't give a flying f*ck."

"Do you ever play a song and then realise you were too distracted to appreciate the beauty of the song so you replay it?"

"Practice safe lunch Always use a condiment"

"Hardest job in the world is being a Police sketch artist in China."

"Give a man a baby, and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to baby, and i think this saying only works for fish actually."

"What did Abraham Lincoln say after a three-day drinking spree? ""I freed the what?"""

"What do turtles and pedophiles have in common? They both get there before the hare/hair."

"I can't stand cripple jokes"

"I admire feminists... Especially those with huge tits and a nice juicy ass."