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Joke of the Day

"Beyonce: 'Who run the world?' Generally people who have at least a basic understanding of grammar."

"What's the difference between Trump and a Tree? Only one can get stumped..."

"My dog just ate a butterfly and probably saved Tokyo from a tidal wave. I don't understand science."

"I can't wait to be ashamed of what I do this weekend."

"I was visiting /r/nononono and I saw the rule on people not being able to walk away from something, and so I thought... What if they crawled away?"

"This may be a bit messed up. If you eat one thing a lot, people tend to joke that you'll ""become it"". I used to eat vegetables. Guess what I became."

"People who write ""u"" instead of ""you"". What do you do with all the time you save?"

"The older you get the less people you can actually tolerate. I can tolerate about 5 people right now, 3 are my children and even that's iffy"

"What does a geography graduate do with a lightbulb? Not get a job."

"What is the cheapest meat available? Deer Balls. They're under a buck!"