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Joke of the Day

"What does a geography graduate do with a lightbulb? Not get a job."

"What's the hardest part about cooking a vegetable? Getting the wheelchair in the pot."

"Q: How so you call a member of the finacial staff of the faculty of Biology? A: A Buy-ologist."

"The 2 Golden Rules of Religion 1) Be kind to other people. 2) KILL THE FILTHY INFIDELS!!!!"

"A man using Apple Maps walks into a bar... Or a hospital.... Or possibly a church."

"A bloke walks into a bar with his gorilla and the barman asks ""What drink can I get you?"" ""Just ice for Harambe"""

"Why does the letter ""r"" make all the difference between Friday and Sunday? payday vs prayday."

"Eat right. Stay fit. Die anyway."

"""Ejaculate"" shouldn't just be strictly a sexual term. I should be able to ""ejaculate"" out of a restaurant (leave quickly)."

"I tried to be polite and hold the door open for a woman, but she kept screaming, ""I'm peeing in here!"" Fucking b*tch."