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Joke of the Day

"AVENGERS ASSEMBLE! THOR: ""here"" IRON MAN: ""here"" HULK: ""here"" PHIL COLLINS - ""here"" ... ok Phil how do u keep getting into S.H.I.E.L.D man"

"If I'm ever on life support, I want you to pull up he plug... Then wait 10 seconds and plug it back in, maybe that'll work."

"I have absolutely no idea what the phrase ""saving room for dessert"" means."

"Where do two electrons race? On a circuit"

"When I met you I was completely blown away because the wind was ridiculous."

"Yes, I love them, Friend: You have sweet shop, don't you feel like eating? Him: Yes, I love them, but dad put all sweet counted, so I taste them and put them back..!!"

"Scientists have recently discovered the existence of a mentally unstable microscopic parasite on the moon... Apparently it's a real lunatic"

"If you don't sit down to a nice big plate of breakfast for dinner once in a while, you're missing out on one of the best things in life."

"What did the Pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye Matey"

"I asked my immigrant Asian parents if they knew what Roe v. Wade was. ""Umm... the decision we had to make when we came to this country?"""