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Joke of the Day

"If only life could be like the movies!* *i.e., every time someone gets a nosebleed it means they'll be dead soon"

"*logs on* jesus christ *logs off*"

"One day a skunk and an opossum go to church. They had to sit in their own pew."

"Why did the pirate have to change wenches? His old one wouldn't let him swab her poop deck."

"A shirt so loud, you have to wear ear plugs when you put it on."

"My position on marijuana is slumped in a beanbag chair."

"WHO WAS THE PERSON WHO PASSED UP THE CHANCE TO CALL GERMAN CURRENCY GERMONEY"

"I only know bad chemistry jokes Cause all the good ones Argon"

"Two fish were in a tank... One says to the other: you shoot, I'll drive"

"Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize? He was outstanding in his field."