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Joke of the Day

"I am going to follow a random gang of drunk girls around the night club tonight, and just be in the background of all of their photos."

"[Walk into a Cat Cafe] Me-I've never eaten cat. What do you recommend? Lady-They're for adopting not eating M-Oh, well can I adopt one? L-No"

"What do white nationalists call three left turns? An alt-right"

"A man is suing a hardware for selling him a bucket with holes in it. Personally, I don't think his argument holds water."

"I asked my dog if he'd ever heard of Pavlov He said, ""I can't say for sure, but the name rings a bell."""

"My girlfriend accidentally shoved a pair of glasses up my ass... Now my hindsight is 20/20"

"What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? Santa stops at 3 ho's."

"Had sex with a deaf and blind paraplegic girl. Fucked her senseless."

"I heard this amazing joke the other day, made me laugh so hard. Unfortunately I seem to have forgotten it."

"Who is the oppostite of Cristopher Walken? Christopher Reeve"