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Joke of the Day

"When I grow up and have kids... I think I will stay a virgin to set a good example."

"Whats the difference between jam and jelly? I cant jelly my dick up your ass"

"There are 3 kinds of people in this world Those who can count and those who can't"

"What does a doctor say to the new father of a stillborn child? Close, but no cigar."

"My son has a play-date today & the mom said to dress him in holiday colors so he's in all black & I'm telling her we worship the dark lord."

"Did you know that if everyone in the U.S. donated just one pint of blood, we could pour it over the Statue of Liberty and be hella cool?"

"Q: Why did the blonde drive into the ditch? A: To turn the blinker off."

"My friend came over and left his laptop on the floor. My mother thought it was a scale. Conclusion: My mother weighs 950 dollars."

"Why do gay people dress so well? They didn't spend all that time in the closet doing nothing!"

"Q: Where is the world's fastest chicken from? A: Ethiopia!"