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Joke of the Day
"When confronted, people in wheelchairs never seem to stand up for themselves."
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"When a cashier thanks you for your purchase, unsettle them by looking deep in their eyes and softly saying, ""Anything for a friend."""
"Great job keeping shit out of my eye, eyelash that's currently in my eye."
"What's hard, long and has cum in it? A Cucumber..."
"Damn you E Cards! Your making it too easy to share my stolen status'!"
"I like to call my dick Metapod.... Cuz all it does is harden"
"I wish my girlfriend was like my internet My internet goes down once a week for at least two hours"
"Relationship status: I'm seeing several women in my neighbourhood. *wipes binoculars*"
"I asked my wife to pick up some French bread from the grocery store But ciabatta roll instead."
"Why would a married man buy a hearing aid?"