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Joke of the Day

"Two Lumberjacks were killed during a recent hurricane. The next day's headline read: ""Nature Shows Idiomatic Side; Kills Two Beards with One Storm""."

"LPT: If you ever get cold and don't have a sweater, stand in a corner for a few minutes; they're usually about 90 degrees. ( )"

"*gets on 1 knee* Jenny... ""OMG"" *places hand on heart and starts crying* ""This is great!"" *gets on 2nd knee* I'm having a heart attack"

"Why is Alabama the smartest state? Because it has four A's and one B."

"Why did the lizard take viagra? He suffered from a reptile disfunction."

"We need to stop joking on fat people so much. They have enough on their plate already."

"I knew this guy who would ask men at church, ""is your tie made out of bird cloth?"" <blank stare> ""It's cheep, cheep, cheep."""

"Intelligence always beats good looks. But just to be safe I've got both covered."

"What did the Pencile say to the other pencil? what did the pencile say to the other pencil the answer is........... Your Looking Sharp :)"

"I had sex and all I got were these kids."