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Joke of the Day

"I played the word ""mature"" in a game of Scrabble. My friend played ""immature"" and got the Triple Word Score so I flipped the board over."

"There is no ""we"" in pizza"

"Never trust a man that says, ""Trust me."" and never trust a woman that says ""It's fine."""

"""Your under arrest!"" No, YOU'RE under arrest *police looks around points to himself & mouths 'me'* Yeah you. *he tosses me cop car keys*"

"One wind turbine says to another ""what music do you like?"" ""well I'm a big metal fan"""

"Whats black and sits at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking in a house fire."

"Math problems are like women If they're under 18 just do them in your head"

"how do you keep bacon from curling in the pan? You take away their tiny brooms."

"(NSFW) I heard he's so rich ... he takes a golden shower every morning."

"RIP to my hair dryer. It was the only thing to blow me for the last 10 years and never complain."