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Joke of the Day

"I'm thinking of becoming a yoga instructor... but I know know how I'm going to support myself."

"What illness causes breasts to grow all over your body? Heap-a-tities."

"WAITER: how was everything ME: [rubbing belly] so delicious. thank u WAITER: great. please stop rubbing my belly"

"My dog got hit by a train today & we found out my brother didn't make parole. Talk about a case of the Mondays!!"

"You are proof that evolution CAN go in reverse."

"How much does a pirate pay for corn? A buccaneer"

"I love Yahoo Answers because no matter how bizarre my question, someone in the world has already thought of it. And thats really comforting."

"My girlfriend called me a pedophile yesterday. I said wow, that's a big word for a 9 year old"

"Hey, Facebook. Dead people can't read your RIP shoutouts, because death."

"NCAA Hockey needs to re-name brackets. How is Alaska in the NE? They can see Russia."