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Joke of the Day

"My friend said after getting his second divorce that he forgot what pussy looks like... But he knows what a cunt looks like"

"Why are tampons always grumpy? Because they're stuck up cunts."

"""I was in a very generous mood today"" a woman says to her friend. ""I gave a poor beggar $25."" ""Thats a lot of money to give away"" says her friend. ""What did your husband say?"" ""He said 'Thank you'. """

"My friend ""Jesus wasn't that special""... After he said that I say ""but he made thousands of people bread"" He turns back to me and says ""so what, hitler made 6 million Jews toast"""

"Which rapper would you rather bring back from the dead? - Tupac - Biggie Smalls - Eazy E - Meek Mills"

"What language does a homosexual jew speak? .....Heblew"

"Did you hear about the chameleon who couldnt change colour? He had a reptile dysfunction!"

"What did one bird say to another bird on New Year's? WOW THAT YEAR FLEW BY *slaps knee, then crawls back under rock*"

"What did the man say when he stopped piggybacking his fat friend? ""Man, it feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders!"""

"When I was a kid the swear jar at my house was always empty because my sister was a goddamn fucking thief."