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Joke of the Day

"1940 I met my first love. 1942 I met my second. Then I met my third at 1948. It's been a hectic evening."

"Every Scooby-Doo mystery could be solved by asking, ""1: Who is your most disgruntled employee?"" and ""2: Does he have access to a mask shop?"""

"What's big, bounces, and makes little kids cry? My donation check to the orphanage."

"I just got fired from my job at the fruit market. I was driving people bananas."

"Went to the doctors yesterday and was told I have to stop masturbating, Apparently it was upsetting the other people in the waiting room"

"How does a Muslim shut a door? Islams it."

"If Trump becomes president... Orange will really be the new black"

"Roses are grey, violets are grey. I'm a dog."

"What did the fish say when it ran into the wall? DAM! (airplane stewardess told me and had me on ground laughing)"

"What's brown and sticky? My poster of Beyonce."