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Joke of the Day

"The Avengers must love Daft Punk They were up all night to get Loki"

"Bruce Willis is at IKEA when a toilet plunger falls off a shelf and sticks to his head. he doesn't notice until the following day"

"What's the difference between a tsunami and a bear? A tsunami doesn't care that you are faster than your buddy."

"What's a nuclear scientist's favourite food? Fission chips."

"I just used ""volumizing"" shampoo for the first time.... Everything sounds the same."

"What did the driver say to the one-legged hitchhiker? Hop in."

"So I went to the doctor for my annual prostate exam today.... I asked the doctor ""Where I should put my pants?"" He replied ""Over there next to mine."""

"Early to bed, early to rise makes people suspicious."

"nsfw Why did the gay have sex with the lesbian? To get back at her girlfriend."

"A distraught farmer asked a preacher what would happen if he killed a beaver who had begun working near the canal by his farm. ""Damned if you do, dammed if you don't."""