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Joke of the Day

"It only takes 3 inches to please a woman And it doesn't matter if it's Visa, MasterCard, or American Express."

"Yesterday I bought an expensive but poorly made tie... I think my ascot ripped off!"

"How do you pump a Republican for information? With a plunger."

"Looks like balls = Scrotesque."

"Yo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank they turn off the surveillence cameras"

"It would be great to be born on Earth and die on Mars. Preferably not on the point of impact."

"ME: *to friend* you're dumb as a box of rocks lol BOX OF ROCKS: *putting finishing touches on his astrophysics thesis* dude"

"Durex's ""Eggplant Flavoured"" condom won't be the first time a woman's being pleasured by a vegetable. Just ask Mrs. Stephen Hawking."

"CIA 'Mistakenly' destroys copy of 6,700-page US torture report A CIA spokesperson commented, ""We meant to destroy the 6,700-page US espionage report"""

"u think u had a bad day? smh think about the tree that just got cut down to make flyers for the next nickelback concert"