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Joke of the Day

"People who misuse apostrophes can go to he'll. (OC)"

"How can you judge how good the orgasm was? From the amount of time it takes you to press Alt-F4 afterwards."

"This milk's brand name is ""Organic Valley."" I can't drink it. Too grossed out picturing livers, spleens and pancreases sitting in a valley."

"I went to bed last night and my brother came out of the closet and scared the shit out of me, I forgot we were playing hide and seek..."

"What do you call the reasoning behind mexican murderers? Locomotives"

"You texted ""SORRY"" followed by six ""!""s, and seven was the minimum I was looking for so... apology not accepted"

"What do you call a really expensive tombstone? A R.I.P off."

"I bet ducks would love bananas if they knew about bananas."

"It must be pretty bad being the wife of a suicide bomber... Because if they come home after work, they've had a bad day."

"You know it's not believable when six people rob a bank in a movie if you've ever tried to organize a dinner for six people."