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Joke of the Day

"A man walks into a bar, He says ouch."

"How does a Muslim shut a door? Islams it."

"""The book was way better"" - hobo trying to burn a DVD for warmth"

"How many aspiring actresses does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know - normally they screw in the casting director's hot tub"

"What does a pig put on it's nose for a sunburn? Oinkment!"

"Having sex with a waitress sucks. She only takes the tip."

"Why was the plumber sad? He had a shitty job."

"My favorite sex move is ""The JFK"" That's where I splatter all over her face while she screams and tries to get out of the car."

"Why are people who work in IT amazing at relationships and sex? When there is a problem they just turn them off and back on"

"A soft drink is just a drink that needs a minute. Just give it a minute, this has never happened to it before."