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Joke of the Day

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? One, she just holds the bulb to the socket and waits for the world to revolve around her."

"I like to mix things up a bit and go to a fast food place and complain that there isn't enough pubic hair or fingernails in my food."

"Why can't a bicycle stand on its own? It's two tired."

"What did the vegetables say at the garden party? Lettuce turnip the beet"

"What has 7 arms and sucks? Def Leppard"

"If someone casts me in a live musical I promise to go off book and start talking about 9/11"

"Cop: ""Any idea why I pulled you over?"" Me: ""you've got a fat guy fetish?"" Cop: ..."

"""Ramen"". - Scooby Doo, finishing a prayer"

"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's a really obscure number, you've probably never heard of it."

"What's the worst thing about Mexican and Black jokes? Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal."