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Joke of the Day

"Just once I want to see a new parent post a baby photo on Facebook with the words: ""Still not sure if we like it, tbh."""

"What's the difference between a tuna, a piano, and a tub of glue? You can tuna piano, but you can't piano tuna."

"Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere"

"What do you call it when you shoot 49 hot loads in people at a gay bar? An Orlando ~~black~~ *white* sheet party..."

"The Walking Dead Season Finale Check back in six months for the punchline."

"The second I feel pressured to do something, I'm out of there faster than a dog who hears his name and knows it's bath time."

"Where do Sikhs buy clothes? Turban Outfitters"

"So I just started my own indoor ship production company. Production was great, until sales started going through the roof."

"What's E.T. short for? Because he's got little legs."

"What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen."