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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a tuna, a piano, and a tub of glue? You can tuna piano, but you can't piano tuna."

"I own a lot of cleaning supplies for someone whose friends inscribed ""dust me"" on my coffee table recently."

"Did you hear about a guy who collected memorabilia of Rosa Parks, Florence Nightingale, Joan of Arc, and Wonder Woman? Apparently, he was a heroine addict."

"What is the most famous shark? William Sharkspeare!"

"I asked my North Korean friend how it was to live in North Korea. He said he can't complain."

"In the south, you're either ghetto, or a farmer. You can't be both, otherwise... *It's racism.*"

"Es cargo A snail was writing s on his car a boy sees him and asks ""Why are you writing s on your car"" the snail says ""So when people see me driving they'll say wow look at that Es cargo """

"What's the most popular contraceptive in Israel? Iron condome"

"@GaryDelaney: If you watch Benjamin Button backwards you won't be able to see anything as you'll be facing away from the television. -Gary Delaney"

"Tattooes turn an average man into a man to look twice at. If i see ink i know he can handle pain....and that works for me, cause I'm a pain."