106817

Joke of the Day

"Have you heard about the new store coming to the mall? It's a pretty *hot topic*."

"I just saw an old guy pick a rubber glove out of a garbage can and put it on, and I think he might be missing the point of rubber gloves."

"I want to open a pizza shop called ""Cheesus Crust!"" Our slogan will be: ""Heavenly ingredients, served hot as Hell."" -or- ""Crust has risen."""

"My cousins baby child keeps pointing at me and saying 'cat'"

"ive learned that asians will always make Wong decisions when driving..."

"""Ok last interview question. Biggest weakness?"" ""People say I'm too hospitable."" ""I see. So should I stop sitting on your lap?"" ""Your call."""

"What shape does a muppet follow when throw through the air? Pa-Ra-Bo-La (do doooo do dodo)"

"If you're ever lost in the woods and have a compass, the compass can help you be lost more north."

"I put a tiny bow tie on a ladybug so you could tell he was a male. It looks adorable except for he's dead now."

"If I could go back in time and talk to my ten year old self My parents probably would've put a restraining order on me."