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Joke of the Day

"Non vaccinated I don't believe in vaccines for my children. FDR never had the polio vaccine and he was President for 12 years."

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"How can you tell if a black woman is pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out the cotton is already picked."
"Q: what did one lumber jack say to another lumber jack? A: ""I need to axe you a question."""
"I came up with a great joke about a boomerang but I forgot it. I'm sure it'll come back to me."
"If I find out who stole my copy of MS office, I'll kill you... You have my Word!"
"Why did Cersei Lannister sent princess Myrcella to Dorne? She knew her family history a little too well. Myrcella had two brothers."
"Why does it take 10 women with premenstrual tension to change a light bulb? IT JUST DOES, OK JERK?!!!! NOW SHUT UP OR I WILL STAB YOU WITH THE SCISSORS!"
"Where should we look to stem global overpopulation? The youth in Asia....."
"Last night on stage at the strip club ... ...was the ugliest woman I've ever seen. She danced up to me and said ""Hey handsome, what would you like me to take off first?"" ""My glasses"" I said"
"What do you call a Woman who can balance 3 pints of Lager on her head? Beatrix"