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Joke of the Day

"At any given time, the urge to sing ""The lion sleeps tonight"" is just a whim away a whim away, a whim away, a whim away..."

"Why was the woman sent to jail for 12 months, while the man got a year? Because there needs to be a period at the end of each sentence."

"Women and farting... Why do women hardly ever fart... Because they don't shut their mouth long enough to build up any pressure."

"no idea! I told my boyfriend that my mom is old so she needs to speak slowly and loud. Then I told my mom my boyfriend is retarded. They have no idea!"

"What do you have to know to be an auctioneer? Lots"

"BREAKING NEWS: New iPad Will Do Same Sh*t other iPads Already Do!"

"What do you call a iPhone 6S when its out of memory? Successful. *if u dont get the joke, successful = six-es-ful*"

"Experts determine Super Bowl blackout was an electrical issue, also determine grass has a green issue."

"Joke about the word joke There has to be one, there's a joke about everything, but I just can't find it, do any of you know a good joke or pun about the word joke?"

"My gf told me to stop being childish, she just wants to come in for a talk not my fault she cant remember the password to my pillow fortress"