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Joke of the Day

"Nothing good can come out of answering your landline."

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"What did the monkey say when he caught his tail in the revolving door? It won't be long now..."
"So I was in sex-ed class when the teacher asked me what comes after 69. Apparently ""70"" was not the correct answer."
"North Korea banned the use of sarcasm towards the government; I wouldn't last an hour before they executed me."
"So this blonde walks in to a computer store... ... and says to the employee; have you got any curtains? Employee says; um no sorry this is a computer store Blonde; duhh, I have windows."
"Why does Arnold Schwarzenegger kill insects? Because he's an ex-terminator"
"If at first you don't succeed, skydiving just isn't for you."
"Amazon Review: A History of Criminals Not a bad book. Prose and cons."
"At first I thought this subreddit was beating a dead horse. But it had only fainted."
"*baby takes first step* wow took you long enough"