105825

Joke of the Day

"You know why it'd called modern jazz right? No? It's because ""A peace if crap was already taken."""

Next Joke
 
"A vampire masturbating into a mirror. You didn't see that coming."
"Why are women terrible drivers? Because making sandwiches behind the wheel is a lot harder than making them in the kitchen."
"What can a duck do that a lawyer can't? Shove its bill up its ass."
"I was pretty nervous doing stand-up in front of a bunch of nudists but then I imagined the crowd in their underwear and it helped so much."
"I was told to drink a lot of Perrier My fizzy eau therapist insists on it."
"[diary, day 3642 on deserted island] How can I still be fat?"
"Every night before bed I do this cute little thing where I stare at the Internet for 6.5 hours"
"What does a tuna, a glue stick, and a piano have not have in common? You can tune a piano, but you can't piano a tuna."
"Why did the chicken cross the playground ? To get to the other slide"