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Joke of the Day

"*Wife thumps door* ""I KNOW UR IN THERE! U BLEW OUR SAVINGS ON A SHITTY INVENTION, DIDN'T U?!"" NO! *furiously flushes 1000s of dog-tampons*"

"Mother-in-laws Two men are sitting in a pub when one turns to the other and says ""My mother-in-law is a saint,"" To which the other man replies ""You're so fucking lucky! Mine's still alive,"""

"You know why the Baptists don't make love standing up? They don't want people to think they're dancing. Not my joke cheech marins I'm high as Fuck and thought you guys might like it too."

"While never officially canonized by a Pope, Saint Patrick is widely recognized as the patron saint of Slytherin."

"I pray every night that I never become religious..."

"There's this blind old man Going for walk, he walks into a fish market, takes a deep breath and says good morning ladies..."

"The biggest difference between men and women is what comes to mind when the hear the word FACIAL"

"I don't know what's more disturbing? My son reading a billboard that says ""LIVE NUDE GIRLS"" or him asking if there's dead ones."

"Everyone in the world but you is a robot and the experiment is going really poorly."

"TIFU by not posting in the correct subreddit."