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Joke of the Day

"I don't always tell Dad jokes... But I've been saving the best ones for twenty years, and we're going have such a laugh when he comes back with those smokes!"

"Past, Present, and Future walk into a bar. It was tense."

"A robot nervously gets into a hammock. Stiff as a board and holding on for dear life, he looks to his friend and screams ""TAKE THE PICTURE!"""

"Two peanuts were walking down the street One of them was assaulted"

"*Eating mini Reese's cups* 5&7: Mommy what are you eating? M: Dog poop."

"Why did the period and and semicolon break up? Because they had nothing in comma"

"What does a ghost wear when it's raining? boooooooooooooots"

"I like my women like I like my Scotch. Noice."

"How does Harry Potter like his sandwiches to be cut ? Diagon alley"

"What do you call 24 carrots? Edible gold."