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Joke of the Day
"what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef"
Next Joke
"Extra car key Extra house key Extra storage unit key Key to an extra apartment with a liquor cabinet - Keys to a successful relationship"
"My wife and I have lost 150 lbs combined!!! The search team are taking longer than expected to get her body back from the river though."
"Why are black people tall? Because they knee grows.."
"The thing that makes learning how to use chopsticks so difficult is that the longer you use them, the soggier your cereal gets."
"[At a psychic fair] Psychic: Ask whatever you want to know. Success? Work? Love? Money? Me: Can you tell me where my car keys are?"
"4 out of 5 doctors fail to recommend Chuck Norris as a solution to most problems. Also, 80% of doctors die unexplained, needlessly brutal deaths."
"Ever been to a Canadian mosh pit? ""Oh sorry eh! Oh! Sorry! Sorry, eh? Sorry? So sorry! Oh! Oh no.... Sorry, eh?"""
"Kid: Dad, a girl called me ugly, how long does ugly last.. Dad:Hey hun Mom:Yes? Dad: How old are you? Mom: 45 Dad:theres your answer kid"
"My girlfriend starting putting a miniature Sylvester Stallone doll in the middle of the bed a few months ago Things have been a little rocky between us ever since"