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Joke of the Day
"bones found on the moon..... ....apparently the cow didn't make it ?"
Next Joke
"How do ghosts become friends? They bond over boos. I made this up while sleep-deprived last night. I am sorry."
"What do Pink Floyd and Dale Earnhardt Sr have in common? Each of their last big hits was the wall."
"How do you organize a space party? You planet."
"Why do married men hang strobe lights from their bedroom ceilings? To create the optical illusion that their wives are moving during sex."
"You smell like trash..... Can I take you out?"
"There's no better feeling than not giving a fuck."
"Him: What are you doing? Me: Tweeting. Him: Gah. Such a colossal waste of time. Me: *stare* Him: *goes back to playing Candy Crush*"
"What do they call traffic laws in 3rd world countries? Guidelines"
"I happily dad joked my fiance While on her way to work, she texted me saying she only put deodorant on one side. To which I replied, ""At least you won't smell half bad!"""