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Joke of the Day

"Why are all Quaker truck drivers stuck in the 1980's? Q:Why are all Quaker truck drivers stuck in the 1980's? A: Because they are Haulin' Oats!"

"A pirate walks into a bar... The bartender says ""Hey do you know you have a steering wheel in your pants?"" The pirate says ""Arrr... It's driving me nuts!"""

"Me: [in bathroom] 7yo: [knocks] MOMMY? Me: Yeah pal 7: IT'S ME Me: I know 7: YOUR SON Me: Knew that too"

"Conjunctivitis.com Now there's a site for sore eyes."

"If April showers bring Mayflowers, what do Mayflowers bring? Pilgrims"

"What did the 0 say to the 8? Cool belt fuckface"

"when i found out i won the World's Saddest Man award i became slightly happy and was immediately stripped of my title"

"Give a man a fish: you just killed a fish. Teach a man to fish: you just killed like a thousand fish"

"Just saw a homeless woman try to use a cat as a telephone. She accepted a cigarette in exchange for the cat. Cat is my telephone now."

"How did the Otaku Redneck guy name his daughter? Annie Mae"