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Joke of the Day

"Anglo/German Dad Joke Q: What do you call an elf that's afraid of Jethro Tull? A: 10:45"

"Why did the cow slap the bull? He didn't play well with udders."

"A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink... When the neutron gets his drink, he asks, ""Bartender, how much do I owe you?"" The bartender replies, ""For you, neutron, no charge."""

"Did you hear about the old chameleon that couldn't change color? He had *a reptile dysfunction*."

"Fighting Fire with Fire Have you ever heard the phrase ""fight fire with fire""? Have you ever actually tried that? I have, you know what happens? You just get a much larger fire."

"What do you call a gay vampire? A fruit bat."

"What do you call a pachyderm that doesn't matter? Irrelephant."

"Throwing away a good relationship because of problems that can be worked out, is like throwing away a new car because of a flat tire."

"Did you hear about the new emo pizza? You just make fun of it, and it cuts itself!"

"If you took your large intestine and stretched it out in a straight line it would be very hard to get it back in you after that. So tangly."