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Joke of the Day
"What's the first thing I will desperately need to buy after winning the Lottery New pants"
Next Joke
"How does every black joke start? *Looks over shoulder *"
"At cardio class tonight, a 22yo size 0 told me ""you run fast for someone your age"" so now I have a body to bury if anyone wants to help me."
"What do you call a white girl who can run faster than her brothers? A redneck virgin."
"You know what's a big ripoff? Velcro"
"I named my boat ""Marriage""... so that it will never sink, cause marriage is a hardship."
"By not having a 160 character limit, we are missing out on all the good tweets that have 141 through 160 characters. It's science."
"I got mad at my uncle for telling me the results of the Cubs game because he is an hour ahead of me in New York. And he doesn't have a DVR."
"Who has two thumbs and a concealed identity? Disguise!"
"My doctor told me I only have two months left to live so I shot him, judge gave me 30 years."