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Joke of the Day

"A breakfast crime Did you here about the egg who *cracked* the case?. He was super *yolked* so it was *over-easy*."

Next Joke
 
"Me: Oh my god, that cat is adorable! She's the cutest kitty I've ever seen! Cat: I just want to be friends."
"What if texting broke for a month society would be like uhhhhhjjjjjjhhhhhhhhhhh ""hello may I please speak to so and so"" all nervous and shit"
"I wonder if Morgan Freeman talks himself to sleep every night."
"Why Weren't There Many Jokes in the Dark Ages? No one could perform the execution well enough."
"I saw a porn starring Tila Tequila today The nice man even salted her rim."
"These people are screaming like they've never seen pompoms on an axe before."
"Just finished building Rome with Legos. Took me a day."
"Fuck, marry, kill? Your sibling. Your mom. Your dad. Fuck all of them"
"so true story, i just mindlessly outstretched my fingers to graze the rear end of a Macy's mannequin that turned out to be a real human man"