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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a lesbian Dinosaur? A lickalotapuss What do you call a gay dinosaur? A megasaurass"

"I told my African friends a joke about rain They didn't get it"

"Q: How is lightning like a violist's fingers? A: Neither one strikes in the same place twice."

"My uncle was an unusual man. Prosthetic legs, real feet. This is Steve Wright's joke, not mine"

"Me: ""Can I see the baby?"" Sister: ""Yes, but only if she's awake."" Me, through a megaphone: ""NOT A PROBLEM."""

"[1st date] So, what's your back story? ""I have scoliosis"" No, I mean your BACK STORY, like your history ""Oh! I got scoliosis as a child"""

"Holy shit a street psychic just stopped me & said I'm a special person who cares deeply about some things & I'm freaking 'cause that's SO me"

"Is it me or does it seem like Cinco de Mayo is always on May 5th?"

"What do you call ten Utah State law students standing ear to ear? A wind tunnel."

"gross i hate the word moist! give me a wet cake. give me a wet, damp cupcake"