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Joke of the Day

"3 Old Women and a Flasher Three old women are sitting on a park bench when a man comes by and flashes them. Two of them have a stroke, and the third one couldn't reach."

"FARMER: Who raided my vegetable patch? PIGLET: Beets me!"

"Divorces should just be reverse weddings where you get pushed out of a church while your friends steal appliances from your home."

"I'm so embarrassed! My wife caught me measuring my cock! It reached just to the back of her sister's throat."

"I once shot a deer in my pajamas... How it got in my pajamas, I will never know."

"How did Einstein prove you can break the law of relativity? He married his cousin."

"There was a massive fight in the chip shop yesterday! A fish got battered."

"Last week I went golfing and finally beat my wife... Those are two separate things."

"In Starbucks a woman went sh*t house rat crazy when she got a double shot of espresso instead of the triple shot she ordered. I'm fine now."

"A wife comes home and says, ""Pack your bags, honey, I just won the lottery!"" The guy says, ""Great darling. Should I pack for the ocean or the mountains?"" She says, ""I don't care, get out!"""