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Joke of the Day

"the only exercise this month ive done is running out of money"

"Liberal Congress people didn't get gunned down while a white guy was president. Just sayin'..."

"I've never wished death on anyone. It's the absolute *last* thing anyone should have to go through."

"What's white and sticky? What's white and sticky and hangs from the clouds? . The second coming of the Lord"

"How many idiots does it take to change a light bulb? Five - one to hold the bulb, and four to turn his ladder"

"A cop pulled over a spanish photon... The cop asked, ""Do you know how fast you were going?"" The photon said, ""c."""

"A rose by any other name would smell as sweet. That rose's name? Albert Einstein."

"Dermatologists hate him! It's not because he has a great skin or anything. He's just an asshole"

"Did you hear about the new housing being built where dwarves can live at no charge? It's called the ""Stayfree Mini Pad"""

"What is the sharpest thing in the world? A fart. It will cut through your pants and not even leave a hole."