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Joke of the Day

"Why did the commuter want the carpool driver to take the bridge? To avoid car-pool tunnel!"

"What do you call a pothead that murders? Stonedface killer."

"When parents say to kids ""go to ur room & think about what you've done"" it's really good practice for what you'll do every night as an adult"

"I think my cell mate is gay... He closes his eyes when I kiss him goodnight."

"Why are gay men so well dressed? ~~7~~ They didn't spend all that time in the *closet* doing nothing!"

"The font for alphabet soup Is times new ramen."

"Why did the superhero flush the toilet? It was his duty!!!! told to me by my 7yo son"

"Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. Who threw that? Gary, was that you? Don't act innocent, I know you download music illegally."

"8yo: Ghosts real? Me: No! 4yo: I heard groaning last night 8yo: & a bed squeaking and moaning 4yo: What was that? Me: .. Them: .. Me: Ghosts"

"I wish I could be like Wall Street Seems to be in bed with a lot of people these days!"