231486

Joke of the Day

"I heard they were going to fine bad drivers $100 on the spot. That's bit sexist, isn't it?"

"What do you call a record of everything that goes in and out of your ass? An ANALog."

"Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes... That way, when you do criticize him, you'll be a mile away AND have his shoes!"

"Welcome to Applebee's! Can I take your order or do you need a few minutes to reflect on the mistakes you made in life that led you here?"

"A Mexican magician says he will disappear on the count of three. He says ""Uno, dos.."" *poof* He disappeared without a tres."

"Q: What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars? A: Tyrannosaurus wrecks!"

"How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? to get to the other side..."

"Just asking for a friend, if one of your testicles drooped more than the other would you see a doctor?"

"Did you hear about the guy whose toilet flushes with hot water? He thinks he's real hot shit."

"My Mom taught me to treat others the way I want to be treated so I always walk up to strangers and spray canned cheese in their mouth."