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Joke of the Day

"I don't know why I even bother having an iPhone anymore. It spends so much time on charge, you might as well call it a landline."

"The secret to a long life Avoid death"

"I hate when girls say, ""you probably say that to every girl."" don't you use the same resume when applying to different jobs?"

"'Failed to send tweet,' is Twitter's polite way of saying, 'Dude..'"

"What's something a gay man can't live without? Water"

"Quidditch. Scratching yourself with a pound coin."

"What did the Hispanic chef say when he went down on his girlfriend? ""Umami!"""

"What did they call Hitler after he lost his hair? The Bald Eagle..... I'm here all day folks"

"Why did the vegetable band break up? They couldn't keep a beet."

"Why do gametes often choose a life of prostitution? because sex cells."