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Joke of the Day

"Just put 3 sugar cubes in my tea, and by sugar, I mean xanax, because sugar is really bad for you.."

"My boyfriend is the best cook With only two nuts, a sausage and some milk he can fill my stomach for 9 months."

"I got a notice that a sex offender just moved in nearby and I'm worried for my children... So I got them all pedometers."

"What did the polite gay man say to the other man when he left the bar? Please allow me to push in your stool sir."

"What did the Catholic Mexican say to greet the Greek God of Thunder? ""hey zeus!"""

"What happened when the cannibal ate the speaking clock? It repeated on him."

"If the human race has a ""signature move,"" its gotta be lying to the dentist about flossing."

"What do you call vampires vagina? Cunt Dracula"

"A banker friend of mine had a breakup recently He lost interest."

"How do you make your girlfriend cry while you're having sex? Call and let her know."