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Joke of the Day

"Some jokes are like doctors... They get better with repeated deliveries."

"You just know I knew my girlfriend was furious when I blew my load early last night....I could see it in her eyes"

"What's the best kind of bee? Boo-bees"

"Why is ok to leave the lid off a basket of socialist crabs? Because whenever one of them climbs to the top, the others drag it back down."

"It's not that the man didn't know how to juggle, He just didn't have the balls to do it."

"If Twitter weren't for unconsidered blather, they wouldn't have named it after bird noises."

"Have you ever opened your wallet and wondered if your dollar bills have ever been in a stripper's butt crack?"

"I thought I saw an octopus but it was just 8 eels kissing a butternut squash."

"I used to go out with a girl who had a wooden leg. Everything went smoothly, then I broke it off."

"(Real Story) All of a sudden, my Steam language was set to Russian. I was changing it back to English, when my hand slipped. But it's okay, now. I have everything in Czech."