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Joke of the Day

"A woman was masturbating furiously on the subway The police were going to arrest her, but she got off."

"Homosexuals please help me. I think my hamsters are gay. How do I let them know it's okay?"

"Toyota's solution for sticky gas pedal - shorten driver's right leg"

"What's the difference between a woman and a gun? Guns don't move out when you bring a new one home."

"Does the 5-second rule still apply in the Men's bathroom at Target? I'm pretty commited to this pretzel, if it matters."

"Why was the milkman afraid on Christmas eve? The ghost of Christmas Pasteurisation."

"I met a Russian homosexual today His name was sir gay"

"I have an epileptic friend... He's a jerk..."

"Whats a dentists favorite time of day? The time of day he get into his BMW to go home from the dentists office after touching mouths all day"

"""Umm, what are you doing? Can you not? Seriously, get off me!"" - The first horse ever ridden (probably)"