102131

Joke of the Day

"A priest, blonde, jew, black guy, chinese guy, and a gay guy walk into a bar. The bartender asks ""What is this, some kind of joke?"""

"If the opposite of pro is con... Wouldn't the opposite of progress be the congress?"

"AC changed bail to basil, and now I'm sitting in jail with some lovely herbs."

"How does someone become a sex expert? They learn the ins and outs"

"[invasion] *aircrafts dropping from the sky *explosions everywhere *mass hysteria Me scrolling phone: Where was that alien invader gif?"

"I've come from the future to let you know the Chilean miners will be OK, and that we haven't yet perfected time travel."

"How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? (None, they just beat the room for being black)"

"If Lance Armstrong and Oscar Pistorius have taught us anything, it's don't trust athletes with missing body parts"

"What's the MOST offensive religious joke you know?"

"My greatest talent is being able to watching 5 years worth of a TV shows in one week."