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Joke of the Day
"Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the No Bell Prize."
Next Joke
"Oh thank goodness, my Uber driver knows what's really wrong with this country."
"Knock knock! ""Who's there?"" ""L.A."" ""L.A. who?"" ""L.A. who Akbar!"""
"I always thought my english grades were good But then in 6th grade, i learned the alphabet"
"How do shellfish get high? At a clam bake"
"I must be looking extra good today because this dude with a backpack on the side of the road was giving me the big thumbs up. Thanks man!"
"Q: How do you catch a red elephant? A: With a red elephant trap."
"I wouldn't mind being catcalled if it were useful: ""Hey baby, boot sale at Macy's!"" or, ""Line's shorter at Starbucks on 5th, sweet cheeks!"""
"""Favorite"" seems like a strong word. There should be a button that's more just ""Hey, fun Tweet. This is fun. We're having fun."""
"My kid brother used to have a lazy eye and had to wear an eye patch. My whole body is lazy so I'm wearing my couch."